The other day, I was looking through old junk in my room. It still looks like a bad episode of Hoarders in there. But at least I tried. I also found some really old journals. I haven’t kept a diary since high school. So naturally I began to read through some of them. There’s a lot of dumb shit in there, as I’m sure you can imagine. Was I really as stupid as those pages would indicate? Apparently so.
I also used to write poems. I thought of myself as somewhat of a poet. But I guess lost that at some point along the way. What a tragedy to the world. I could have been as epic as Keats or Wordsworth or Shelley or Browning. Or Shakespeare or Byron or Burns or Tennyson. And yes, I’m totally just naming poets whose names I remember from my English Literature 12 class. And you know what, some of them wrote random odes to things too. Robert Burns wrote “To a Louse“. I kind of think my odes to my umbrella and my phone are more meaningful that that.
But the poems that caught my eye in this old journal were the simple ones. I had a few pages where I had come up with my own versions of the “Roses are red” poem. Because why wouldn’t I? I think at some point everyone has come up with their own versions of this poem, whether they be good or bad. Side note, did no one ever realize that violets are actually violet, and not in fact blue? I mean it’s right there in the name of the flower. I’ve always had a problem with that. But anyway, I won’t share all of the versions that I came up with. They weren’t all that great. But I will share with you the one that I’ve now deemed as my favourite:
Roses are red.
Water is clear.
You’re still ugly.
I need some more beer.
Yeah. I should really get a job writing for Hallmark.
Surprisingly, I’m not even talking about TV. Shocking, I know. I love more than just TV. Even if I do often refer to it as my boyfriend. And no, it’s not my phone. My phone had a chance but it just keeps disappointing me. And it’s not food either. Or shoes. Or strippers.
So who or what am I talking about? Let’s face it, it’s obviously a what. Of course I would never express my love for an actual person. What do you take me for, a normal human being? Clearly that’s not the case.
What is my one true love? Writing. It always has been, though we have drifted apart at certain times in my life. But I am always happy to reconnect with it.
I don’t know why I haven’t had the time lately. I don’t think I have any more of a life right now than I did at this time last year. And I feel like I was writing a lot more at this time last year. It’s hard to find a balance between life and writing about life.
It’s sad that when I do have free moments in time, other things will often win out over writing. Like watching TV. I guess it’s because TV requires no effort from me whatsoever and can be completely mindless. Not that I don’t often sit and write mindlessly, because I do, but it’s a different form of mindlessness. And I feel better about it. Unlike watching TV, writing allows me to be a part of the process, and to have accomplished something in the end. It doesn’t even matter if it’s good or if anyone reads it. All that matters is I’ve done something that’s my own.
Unlike shoe shopping, or any kind of shopping, writing costs me nothing. Except time. But I enjoy that time immensely. Some people think it’s a waste, but I don’t think anything is a waste if you enjoy it. I think it would be more of a waste for me not to write.
It’s that time of year again. Imagine a room full of rows upon rows of racks of beautiful shoes. More shoes than you would even have time to try on. But you attempt to anyway. That’s right, ladies, the Legendary Army & Navy Shoe Sale is only a few days away. And I do mean legendary in every sense of the word. On Wednesday, April 24th, Army & Navy will open its doors at 8:00 am sharp for eager women in search of the perfect shoes. This is the 64th year that they’ve held this sale and things only get better with time. I’ve been to this sale for the past three years and each time have been increasingly impressed with their selections. They receive well over 100,000 pairs for the sale and are constantly restocking throughout the twelve days.
This year I had the privilege of meeting with footwear buyer Silvio Urbani, who showed me where all the many boxes of shoes are being stored awaiting the sale. I was in awe when I saw all the boxes and skids in the warehouse, just wondering what shoes each one held. I almost felt compelled to grab a box cutter and tear them all apart. But I resisted the urge, as I did not wish to be banned from the store. Instead I listened intently and contained my excitement.
With over 85 brands to choose from, there’s something for everyone. Clarks, GUESS, Kelsi Dagger, BCBG, Nine West, Steve Madden, Qupid, Andrew Geller, just to name a few. I hear that Pour La Victoires are supposed to be a hot seller this year. But how could they not be? They’re gorgeous. And I’m not crazy or shoe obsessed. Okay, who am I kidding, clearly I am. But take my word for it anyway. As a bargain shopper, I know what I’m talking about. Just because you’re paying less for something, doesn’t mean that it’s cheap or that you’re not getting your money’s worth. At Army & Navy, you’re definitely getting more than your money’s worth. Every pair of shoes at the sale is priced at $40 or less, regardless of how much the original cost was. You really can’t go wrong.
Sales this massive may seem intimidating to first timers. But don’t worry, I promise you it won’t be the chaotic, dramatic, aggressive scene that you’re picturing. Over the years, people have actually become more pleasant. Rather than women fighting over shoes, there is now often a sense of camaraderie among them. Last year, I met a lot of great people at the sale. We sat together trying on our shoes, complimenting our various choices and giving our opinions. The staff are also amazing and baskets are provided for those of us who like to try on as many as we possibly can all at once. Shoppers are generally respectful and the sale is a real community building event where women can share their love of shoes.
There are usually about 30,000 customers between the 6 stores each year. Store locations are in Vancouver, New Westminster, Langley, Edmonton, and Calgary. I’ve only ever been to the Downtown Vancouver location on 36 West Cordova Street. That place is like my home away from home. I always feel welcome there and they always meet my needs. With over 100,000 pairs of shoes, you’re bound to find at least one perfect pair. Last year, I believe I found eleven. On day one. Apparently that’s a lot? Each person buys about 3.5 pairs on average at the sale. So you know, there are a lot of practical and reasonable shoppers out there. And then the few excessive and compulsive buyers like myself come along. Because shoe sales are where we belong.
It’s recommended that you go early to make sure you get the deals. I mean, everything’s a deal, but the nicest pairs go fast if you don’t hurry. Doors open at 8:00 am on Wednesday, but people start lining up as early as 5:30 am. Yes, while the rest of you are still asleep, a few
crazy dedicated shoe lovers are out bright and early beginning to form what eventually becomes a massive lineup along Cordova Street. Rain or shine, nothing gets in the way of a a new pair of shoes.
If lineups and ridiculously early mornings aren’t your thing but you don’t want to miss out on first dibs at shoes, don’t fret, there is another way. Contests! I’m not just a bargain shopper and a shoe lover, I’m also a contest enthusiast. So I’m going to go ahead and tell you about the ways in which you can possibly win VIP access to the shoe sale. Because knowledge like this is too good to keep to myself. First off, what is VIP access? Pretty much, you get to skip the line, enter the store before it opens to the public, and go try on shoes before everybody else. So yeah, it’s kind of a big deal.
To win VIP access for you and 3 friends, plus a $250 shopping spree, simply click here and fill out the entry form. I wish you luck! Because we all deserve a new pair of shoes. And the only thing better than a new pair of shoes is a free new pair of shoes. There’s also a contest on the Army & Navy Facebook page where you can win a $100 gift card by uploading a 30 second video clip about your favourite Army & Navy moment. I may enter myself, but there are too many good moments to choose from. And you can win VIP access through their Shoe of the Week contest. You can also win a new pair of shoes plus VIP access through Vancity Buzz. It would also be worthwhile to tune in to your local radio stations and see if they might be giving away any VIP access prizes as well.
If you’re unable to make it first thing in the morning on day one, it’s okay. New stock fills those shelves everyday. There’s room for 30,000 pairs on the shop floor and staff keep busy filling them throughout the day. Every two hours or so is a good time to hit the sale, in between the spurts of crowds. There is more selection this year than ever before and always something for everyone. It’s not just all about heels. If you prefer comfort, you don’t have to sacrifice style, as there are plenty of great flats, sandals, athletic, and walking shoes to choose from. If you’re anywhere between a size 5 and a size 11, there’s sure to be a pair for you. And while men’s shoes aren’t advertised as part of the sale, the store actually does have a great selection of them at reduced prices. Literally something for everyone.
So next Wednesday, I will be at 36 West Cordova Street at 7:00 am. Because clearly I had to book a day off work for this. It’s become a bit of a tradition for me. It’s like a sign that spring is finally here. And with spring, comes an excuse to buy new weather appropriate footwear. Which in Vancouver is sometimes rain boots as opposed to sandals. But Army & Navy has plenty of both so they got you covered. The sale runs from April 24th to May 5th. Hope to see you there!
It’s getting to that point. Well that point was here like a year ago. It’s way past that point now. But I have to get a new phone. It’s ridiculous the amount of times I attempt to do something and that little clock icon is in the middle of my screen and everything is frozen. It’s finally time. I don’t have to put up with this anymore.
But because I’m so indecisive and clueless about technology, I still have no idea what phone to get. I was thinking an iPhone. But then there’s also the Samsung Galaxy. And I’ve even heard good things about the new Blackberry Z10. Although the only reason I like Blackberry is because I like the keypad. But the new Blackberry is a touch screen phone. So what’s the point? Take away the one thing I love about it? No thank you.
But what the hell should I get? What’s the easiest one to use? I need something very user friendly. What phone will I bitch about the least? That’s the phone I want. One that will cause me to never again write another blog post about how much I hate my phone. Does such a phone exist? Or will I just never be happy?
Yeah. So a few years ago, when my dad got Facebook, he sent me a friend request. Which I declined. Because I didn’t want him seeing all my stuff. I felt it was unnecessary. This year, my mom decided to get Facebook. She pretty much just wanted it so she could enter a contest, so she barely ever uses it. Soon after getting it, I received a friend request from her as well. Which I had to decline also. I’m not going to accept one parent and not the other. That just wouldn’t be fair. It’s either all or nothing.
Last week, I received a notification on Facebook that my dad was following me. My immediate thought was “Oh shit!”. And then I looked at my list of followers and realized my mom was following me on Facebook as well. Crap. The only reason I got notified about my dad is because we have one mutual friend. At first I cursed the fact that we had one mutual friend, because I think that’s how he found my profile a couple years ago. But now I’m grateful, because if it weren’t for that friend, I wouldn’t have even been notified about the fact that he is currently following me.
I haven’t talked to them about it at all. But I did immediately update my Facebook status to “My parents are following me on Facebook. This is the beginning of the end.” Which I’m sure they would have read, since my posts should now be showing up in their news feed since they’re following me. I’m not sure how often they check it. I think my dad probably checks it more often than my mom. I think he uses it to check up on me. Maybe it’s a sign that he’s worried about me? Because I’ve been going out so much lately?
Whatever the case, I haven’t yet decided what to do about it. I can a) Do nothing and let them keep following me, b) Block them (Except I’m not actually sure how to block people from following you on Facebook. Is there an option for that somewhere?), c) Admit defeat and just add them as friends, or d) Add them as friends but with a limited profile (which I think is stupid, you may as well not add a person if you’re not going to let them see anything).
I’ve asked people if they think I should just add them as friends and most of them have told me no. But I mean I feel like I’m at a point where it wouldn’t be such a bad thing if I did. I never post anything THAT bad. I don’t think I’ve posted anything that bad recently while they’ve been following me anyway. Although yesterday I may have posted about how I missed out on winning gay porn at Celebrities bingo. But what’s wrong with that? It’s not like I asked for that to be one of the prizes. So it’s fine. Probably the worst thing actually, is the fact that my profile picture right now is of me strewn across the laps of male strippers. I’m guessing that’s probably not a photo you want to see of your daughter. Oh well.
I’m wondering if I do add them as friends, would I end up having to censor myself? I mean, more so than I already do. And if I did, would that be so bad? I remember someone once told me that a good rule of thumb is to not post anything on Facebook that you wouldn’t want your grandma to see. But my grandma would probably let more things slide than my parents. Speaking of which, I just found out my grandma also has Facebook, but I’m pretty sure she never uses it and isn’t sure how it all works. I have not added her either, because I generally don’t add family on Facebook. But I’m considering it.
I was thinking maybe this year, I should just give my parents my friendship on Facebook as a Mother’s Day and Father’s Day present. That’s probably worth more to them than whatever I might buy them, right?
What do you think? Would you add your parents on Facebook, or am I crazy for considering it?