Roses are red…

The other day, I was looking through old junk in my room. It still looks like a bad episode of Hoarders in there. But at least I tried. I also found some really old journals. I haven’t kept a diary since high school. So naturally I began to read through some of them. There’s a lot of dumb shit in there, as I’m sure you can imagine. Was I really as stupid as those pages would indicate? Apparently so.

I also used to write poems. I thought of myself as somewhat of a poet. But I guess lost that at some point along the way. What a tragedy to the world. I could have been as epic as Keats or Wordsworth or Shelley or Browning. Or Shakespeare or Byron or Burns or Tennyson. And yes, I’m totally just naming poets whose names I remember from my English Literature 12 class. And you know what, some of them wrote random odes to things too. Robert Burns wrote “To a Louse“. I kind of think my odes to my umbrella and my phone are more meaningful that that.

But the poems that caught my eye in this old journal were the simple ones. I had a few pages where I had come up with my own versions of the “Roses are red” poem. Because why wouldn’t I? I think at some point everyone has come up with their own versions of this poem, whether they be good or bad. Side note, did no one ever realize that violets are actually violet, and not in fact blue? I mean it’s right there in the name of the flower. I’ve always had a problem with that. But anyway, I won’t share all of the versions that I came up with. They weren’t all that great. But I will share with you the one that I’ve now deemed as my favourite:

Roses are red.
Water is clear.
You’re still ugly.
I need some more beer.

Yeah. I should really get a job writing for Hallmark.

I’ve been neglecting my one true love

Surprisingly, I’m not even talking about TV. Shocking, I know. I love more than just TV. Even if I do often refer to it as my boyfriend. And no, it’s not my phone. My phone had a chance but it just keeps disappointing me. And it’s not food either. Or shoes. Or strippers.

So who or what am I talking about? Let’s face it, it’s obviously a what. Of course I would never express my love for an actual person. What do you take me for, a normal human being? Clearly that’s not the case.

What is my one true love? Writing. It always has been, though we have drifted apart at certain times in my life. But I am always happy to reconnect with it.

I don’t know why I haven’t had the time lately. I don’t think I have any more of a life right now than I did at this time last year. And I feel like I was writing a lot more at this time last year. It’s hard to find a balance between life and writing about life.

It’s sad that when I do have free moments in time, other things will often win out over writing. Like watching TV. I guess it’s because TV requires no effort from me whatsoever and can be completely mindless. Not that I don’t often sit and write mindlessly, because I do, but it’s a different form of mindlessness. And I feel better about it. Unlike watching TV, writing allows me to be a part of the process, and to have accomplished something in the end. It doesn’t even matter if it’s good or if anyone reads it. All that matters is I’ve done something that’s my own.

Unlike shoe shopping, or any kind of shopping, writing costs me nothing. Except time. But I enjoy that time immensely. Some people think it’s a waste, but I don’t think anything is a waste if you enjoy it. I think it would be more of a waste for me not to write.

My parents are following me on Facebook

Yeah.  So a few years ago, when my dad got Facebook, he sent me a friend request.  Which I declined.  Because I didn’t want him seeing all my stuff.  I felt it was unnecessary.  This year, my mom decided to get Facebook.  She pretty much just wanted it so she could enter a contest, so she barely ever uses it.  Soon after getting it, I received a friend request from her as well.  Which I had to decline also.  I’m not going to accept one parent and not the other.  That just wouldn’t be fair.  It’s either all or nothing.

Last week, I received a notification on Facebook that my dad was following me.  My immediate thought was “Oh shit!”.  And then I looked at my list of followers and realized my mom was following me on Facebook as well.  Crap.  The only reason I got notified about my dad is because we have one mutual friend.  At first I cursed the fact that we had one mutual friend, because I think that’s how he found my profile a couple years ago.  But now I’m grateful, because if it weren’t for that friend, I wouldn’t have even been notified about the fact that he is currently following me.

I haven’t talked to them about it at all.  But I did immediately update my Facebook status to “My parents are following me on Facebook.  This is the beginning of the end.”  Which I’m sure they would have read, since my posts should now be showing up in their news feed since they’re following me.  I’m not sure how often they check it.  I think my dad probably checks it more often than my mom.  I think he uses it to check up on me.  Maybe it’s a sign that he’s worried about me?  Because I’ve been going out so much lately?

Whatever the case, I haven’t yet decided what to do about it.  I can a) Do nothing and let them keep following me, b) Block them (Except I’m not actually sure how to block people from following you on Facebook. Is there an option for that somewhere?), c) Admit defeat and just add them as friends, or d) Add them as friends but with a limited profile (which I think is stupid, you may as well not add a person if you’re not going to let them see anything).

I’ve asked people if they think I should just add them as friends and most of them have told me no.  But I mean I feel like I’m at a point where it wouldn’t be such a bad thing if I did.  I never post anything THAT bad.  I don’t think I’ve posted anything that bad recently while they’ve been following me anyway.  Although yesterday I may have posted about how I missed out on winning gay porn at Celebrities bingo.  But what’s wrong with that?  It’s not like I asked for that to be one of the prizes.  So it’s fine.  Probably the worst thing actually, is the fact that my profile picture right now is of me strewn across the laps of male strippers.  I’m guessing that’s probably not a photo you want to see of your daughter.  Oh well.

I’m wondering if I do add them as friends, would I end up having to censor myself?  I mean, more so than I already do.  And if I did, would that be so bad?  I remember someone once told me that a good rule of thumb is to not post anything on Facebook that you wouldn’t want your grandma to see.  But my grandma would probably let more things slide than my parents.  Speaking of which, I just found out my grandma also has Facebook, but I’m pretty sure she never uses it and isn’t sure how it all works.  I have not added her either, because I generally don’t add family on Facebook.  But I’m considering it.

I was thinking maybe this year, I should just give my parents my friendship on Facebook as a Mother’s Day and Father’s Day present.  That’s probably worth more to them than whatever I might buy them, right?

What do you think?  Would you add your parents on Facebook, or am I crazy for considering it?

What happens in Vegas ends up in a blog post

Last summer, I went to Vegas.  With family.  When I tell this to most people, they are initially intrigued by the fact that I went to Vegas.  And then soon disinterested when they find out I went with family.  Almost as though they feel sorry for me.  As if it’s so disappointing and such a waste of a trip.  For most people, a trip to Vegas with your family isn’t as fun or glamorous as a normal Vegas trip would be.  But for me, it was.

My grandma turned 80 years old last year.  And she had never been to Vegas before.  So we thought it would be fun to take her there.  She loves gambling, so I was shocked it was her first time there.  Even I had been before, and I hate gambling.  Mostly because I’m so terrible at it.  But my grandma is more of a risk taker and has more luck than I do, so Vegas was perfect for her.  I’m more interested in the shopping and the shows.  And the food.  And the drinking.  You know, there’s always something for everyone.

Apparently my grandma is afraid of flying in an airplane.  This fear manifested a few years ago, when some idiot made some remarks about how flying was unsafe an whatnot.  I think that was the last time she was in a plane because whatever the guy said on that flight must have freaked her out.  So my aunt and uncle had to drive down to Vegas with her.  I can’t even imagine that long and painful drive.  I’m just so glad I went by plane.

So what’s there to do in Vegas with your family?  So many things!  Despite what many might think, Vegas isn’t just all about the pool parties and the night clubs.  I mean I wouldn’t bring kids there.  Although some people do.  Which is ridiculous.  Walking down the strip at like 11pm, you see families with kids.  And wonder why are you out, shouldn’t you be in bed?  Why are you here?  But anyway.  When you’re with family members who are old enough to appreciate it, Vegas is awesome.

The shows are amazing.  I really wish we had more shows here in Vancouver because I miss it.  I went to a total of seven shows while I was there and they were all spectacular.  I saw Terry Fator, Mac King, Nathan Burton Comedy Magic, Frank Marino’s Divas, Tournament of Kings, The Beatles Love by Cirque du Soleil, and Thunder From Down Under.  Did I mention that I saw Thunder From Down Under with my grandma?  They’re Australian strippers.  Yeah, that happened.

I also went to two buffets.  And I went crazy both time.  You know I love food.  And I tend to have no self control when that food is essentially limitless.  So you can imagine what my plates looked like.  I definitely ate too much, but I have no regrets about that.  I also loved being able to drink in public during the day.  I’m pretty sure if I lived in Vegas, I would be a morbidly obese alcoholic with a lot of debt.

I also hung out by the pool and did a lot of walking along the strip.  And shopping.  I did my fare share of shopping at Ross and at the outlet mall.  I did gamble a little as well.  But as I said, it’s really not my thing.  I lost a bit and then gave up.  I just don’t have my grandma’s luck or perseverance.

Stay tuned for future blog posts about the shows, food, drinks, and fun I had in Vegas…

I think the Monday after Daylight Savings should be a statutory holiday

Seriously.  Wouldn’t that be an awesome idea to implement?  I’m pretty sure everyone would totally be on board with it.  I’ve never liked daylight savings anyway.  Is it really necessary?  We’re not actually “saving” daylight, we’re just adjusting so that we can experience that daylight at a different time.  It’s always such a hassle.  And seems to suddenly just creep up on you.  When I realized last week that the time change would be happening on the weekend, it upset me and I was not prepared.  I had already scheduled a late night on Saturday and an early morning on Sunday.  The loss of an hour made this all the more unbearable.  Apparently there are more car accidents after daylight savings as well.  Because people are tired and still adjusting.  Even though it’s only one hour, it really throws you off.

In the fall, it’s all good and well when we gain an hour.  But in the spring, it’s always painful.  People already complain that there aren’t enough hours in the day to accomplish what they need to.  No one wants to lose an hour.  I know it occurs at 2am in efforts to not be disruptive, but I always wonder about those who work night shifts.  Do they get paid for that hour that technically doesn’t exist?  And when we gain an hour in the fall, do they have to work overtime?  And I’m never sure what time the bars actually plan on closing.  If they normally close at 3am, do they close at 2am which is really 3am, or at 3am which is really 4am?  And the buses.  What time does service actually end?  It’s always so confusing.  It’s also annoying trying to figure out which clocks in your house you need to change manually and which ones will automatically adjust themselves.

But that’s just the way it is and we have to live with it.  I mean I suppose we could boycott it, but then we’d be spending half a year being an hour late for everything.  I imagine it would be difficult to function properly in society that way.  I don’t suppose employers would accept “I’m boycotting daylight savings” as an excuse for tardiness.  I guess if you really hate it that much, you could always move to a place that doesn’t use daylight savings.  One day, maybe I will.

So I don’t have a solution to this problem.  But I think that making the Monday after daylight savings a statutory holiday would be highly beneficial.  I know that we all had Sunday to recover, but Sunday is generally a lazy day anyway.  And it really wasn’t enough.  I’m pretty sure a lot of you were tired today, and therefore much less productive at work.  Imagine if we just had this extra day off.  I for one, would have greatly appreciated it.  I mean I made it through the day, yes, but at what cost?  We deserve another holiday.  And today should have been the day.  I recommend this be implemented for the future.  Who’s with me?

A whole new pizza

On Sunday night, I went to Browns Social House for dinner with a friend. I had a Groupon for it. I have tons of groupons. And slowly but surely, I will eventually get through them all. Hopefully before they expire.

My friend gave up beer for Lent, so instead she ordered a caesar. I could have reminded her that Sundays didn’t count for Lent. But I think she was happy with her caesar, since it was on special. I hate caesars. I feel like every time I go out, they’re what’s on special. How annoying. I opted for a glass of red wine. For the health benefits, naturally.

Pizzas are also on special at Browns on Sundays. I ordered the bbq chicken pizza, which is my favourite. The majority of the time, I eat my entire meal, finishing off everything that’s on my plate. Sometimes I contemplate taking some to go, but then I continue eating to the point where it’s not really enough to pack up and so I may as well just finish the whole thing. So I do.

But not this time. I’m not sure why. I loved the pizza. But I really wanted leftovers because I would be needing both lunch and dinner the following day, as I would be out for the majority of it. So I had 3 pieces left of the 8 and I asked if I could have it packed up. I knew I would most likely just end up eating it when I got home.

A few minutes later, our waitress came back with some news about my pizza. It got dropped. And so they were making me a new one. If that’s not a win, then I don’t know what is. Due to the clumsiness of someone other than myself, I got a whole new pizza instead of just a few slices. This had never happened to me before. I felt as if I’d just won an award. Yay for people dropping things!

Normally, I would end this post with a picture of the aforementioned pizza. But alas, I did not take one. Because I didn’t want to be one of those people who takes pictures of their food. But who the hell am I kidding, I am one of those people who takes pictures of their food. Just not this time. When it would have been good for this blog post. Oh well. Getting the pizza was enough of a win. I don’t need the photographic evidence to prove it.

The best part about Valentine’s Day

The best part about Valentine’s Day does not actually occur on February 14th.  Rather, it begins on February 15th and continues for a couple days after that.  Of course, I’m talking about discounted candy.  For those who may not receive all the heart shaped chocolates and candy that they had hoped for, they can take solace in the fact that they can purchase these for themselves for fairly cheap once the holiday is over.

If anyone is still interested in buying discounted Valentine’s Day candy, there is still plenty of it out there.  At Dollarama, most of the Valentine’s candy is now 3 for $1.  These include heart shaped chocolates, cinnamon hearts, lollipops, and cookies.  There are also some nice gourmet cookies on sale at Winners.  London Drugs, Save On Foods, Safeway, and Shoppers Drug Mart are also worth checking out for their discounts.

Now that Valentine’s day is over, the stores have stocked their shelves with Easter candy. Full price Easter candy.  So naturally, I plan to wait until the day after Easter before I buy any.  Which will be April 1st.  Which is April Fool’s Day.  But discounted candy is certainly no joke.

Discounted Valentine’s Day goodies

My mom needs votes

So my mom entered this Valentine’s Day contest on Facebook and needs votes.  Voting ends in a couple hours.  But I thought I would share the link to her entry in case any of you were so inclined as to do her a favour and vote for her.  It’s a video clip of her reciting a poem she wrote about how she met my dad.  Thanks!

http://bit.ly/14SOxnu

Things I could potentially give up for Lent

- Visa
- Online shopping
- Junk food
- Fast food
- Chips
- Ice cream
- Alcohol
- Candy
- Binge shopping
- Binge eating
- Staying up late
- Buying things I don’t need

I’m pretty sure at least some of these are possible. You have faith in me, right?

Apparently I’ve yet to write a blog post during the month of February

It seems as though this may possibly end up being a shitty year for blogging for me.  Or at least a shitty start of the year for blogging for me.  I can recall times last year when I tried to write a new blog post everyday.  And a bunch of times I actually succeeded.  How the hell did I manage that?  I’m sure I had a life?  I think?  Because I can recall blogging about that life.  So where did that extra time and motivation come from?  I’m honestly so confused right now.

I feel like I literally have no time.  And it saddens me greatly.  When I do have a spare moment, I’m tired.  It’s even a tremendous effort to log into WordPress sometimes.  Is this an all new low of laziness for me?  Maybe.  In terms of blogging.  But I’ve hit many lower lows than this in terms of laziness in life in general.  It’s definitely not that I don’t have anything to blog about.  I’m actually at a point where I have more topics to blog about than I’ve ever had before.  I just don’t have the time to blog about them.  And then there’s also the fact that I’m one of the most indecisive people on earth.  So how do I decide which of my many topics I should blog about?  I don’t.  And they remain unblogged about.  Which really is a shame.

Is it worth it to devote more time to blogging?  There are so many other things I can occupy my time with.  Maybe it is time that I get a new computer.  And a new phone.  That would probably motivate me to want to write more.  If you’re constantly dealing with technology that continues to fail you, then why would you want to devote your time to something that requires its use?  Sometimes I think about starting a blog post and then decide that it isn’t worth the effort and frustration of dealing with my computer.  And my phone.  Well, you know about my phone.  Good luck getting a blog post out of that thing anytime soon.

Since we’re over a week into February, I just figured it was about time for a new blog post.  And I wanted to let you know that I haven’t given up or anything.  I’m still here.  Sadly, I’m nowhere near on schedule with my writing.  Actually, I never really had a schedule.  But I mean there are still a bunch of things from last summer that I thought I would have blogged about but never did.  Should I start with those?  Or just skip to the now and write about more current occurrences?  Or switch back and forth between old and new?  Or would that be too confusing?  Chronological order is usually a good thing, right?  But then this is a random blog, so do I even need any sort of order?

If you have a blog, how do you stay motivated to keep on writing?  Any tips or suggestions?