The worst cough I’ve ever heard

So Translink upset me today. What else is new? I missed three buses due to a stop being rerouted. And then there were like ten transit cops at the sky train station checking fares. Cause you know, that’s completely necessary. Not to mention there’s track maintenance tonight so trains are delayed. And then there’s those annoying people sitting in the aisle seats when the window seat is empty, not leaving room for people to sit. I went and asked a guy if I could sit there and he moved for me. But really, I shouldn’t have to ask.

Now that I’ve said my piece about that, I can get to the real issue at hand. There’s this guy on the Canada Line right now who has the worst cough I’ve ever heard. And I’ve heard some bad ones, let me tell you. I’m actually scared. He sounds like he might cough up a lung. Or worse. I’m not sure what would be worse than coughing up a lung. I don’t really want to think about it. I’m guessing it’s smoker’s cough, but I mean it must be more than that. I’ve never heard a cough before that made me afraid for my own safety.

I can’t describe in words what it sounds like. Even if you could hear me, I wouldn’t be able to properly emulate it. I would say it sounds like a dog barking, but then that would be an insult to dogs and their barking. What I wouldn’t give to hear dogs barking right now instead. It’s just this nasty, loud, throat clearing, hacking sound. Sort of cavemanish. Like grunting almost. Sometimes it’ll stop for a moment but then I’ll hear him again. I’m scared to look over at him. I’m just grateful that he’s not sitting beside me. And I really hope that whatever problem he has clears up soon. And that it’s not contagious, since the Canada Line is a rather confined space.

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3 thoughts on “The worst cough I’ve ever heard

  1. Pingback: Variety at the Crossroads « Queen's end

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