It’s not you. It’s me. I’ve become too dependent on you. For so many things. And it isn’t right. It shouldn’t be this way. You’ve always been there for me and always been able to make me happy. But at what cost? I’ve come to realize that this might actually be a rather unhealthy relationship. It wasn’t always this way. But I feel like things have gotten progressively worse lately and I think I need to put a stop to it before things get out of hand. The joy you bring me is great while it lasts but is often only temporary. Once the moment is gone, I am either left wanting more or filled with regret.
Please don’t misunderstand me. I do not want to end things. I just need to slow things down a little and I think it would be good for us to spend some time apart. People have made remarks about how much time I’ve been spending with you and have suggested that I leave you behind sometimes. But they don’t understand how I just prefer to have you with me everywhere. I just feel better about everything knowing that you’re there. But I need to stop relying on you so much and in order to do so, we can’t be together all the time. It saddens me greatly but it’s for my own good and it’s something I really need to do.
We’ve had so many good times together and you’ve always made me very happy. I can recall times when you weren’t around and how devastated that made me feel. I never want to lose you. You’re so important to me. But sometimes I don’t like the person I am when I’m with you. Somehow I’m more reckless and some may even say out of control. I don’t want to blame you for this but I do think it’s best that I spend some time without you for a while and see how things go. I need to not rely on you so much. I promise I won’t replace you. I just need to spend some time alone.
I’m sorry to be doing this so close to Valentine’s Day. Perhaps that was bad timing on my part. But it has to be done. I remember that one time you rejected me and I didn’t understand because it had never happened before. I will miss you. But if you just give me some time, I am pretty certain I will come back to you if you will let me. I think the time apart will do us some good and it will really help me to sort things out and get my life together with less complications. Some don’t think I am capable of surviving without you. I have to prove them wrong. I know I can. Life is better with you. But I need to prove to others and to myself that I am not dependent upon you. And this is why we need to take a break.
So yeah, I’ve decided to give up my Visa for Lent.